Sunday, May 1, 2011

Mom Knows Best!

Wow I haven't written in awhile! Life gets busy! Geez! Lately I'm just drained! Babies are a lot of work! People tell you before  what you should expect when you become a mom, but I don't think you will ever understand until you're actually in it. Yes I am officially full blown in it!

I think I kind of want to get something off my chest. I am sure every single mom can relate to this.  My inspiration  came from the show Bethenny Ever After. I love it, and I love her! She's so real! Nothing worse than fake people. So anyway there was this scene when her Nanny took her daughter to her church. Long story short it was supposed to just be a prayer service for the baby, but the women in the church kind of took the baby into their own arms and it appeared the baby might be having a christening. This is something special Bethenny wanted at her own church. The poor baby is crying in a strangers arms, and Bethenny was completely out of her comfort zone. These women, who she didn't even know, she felt were crossing the line with her baby. She sort of freaked and pulled her baby out of their arms and ran outside. The woman really didn't mean harm. What actually made me relate was how Bethenny was screaming in her head give me my baby, but she was so hesitant and tyring to be so polite. Bethenny is Mom, and Mom knows what's best. So it makes me ask myself why don't I speak up in similar situations? I know whats best for my baby so SAY something!

This is something that sort of annoys me. No sorry not sort of, it completely drives me crazy!I am sure every single mom can relate to this.  I gave birth to my son, and believe it or not I know him better than anyone else! I know a lot of great women that have had children and are very experienced with kids in general. Sometimes they have great tips that I soak up, but sometimes I want to snap, "I know what my own baby needs!"

I'll give you examples of what I mean. I know when my baby is fussy and really just needs a nap. I know when my baby is fussy and needs a bottle. I know when my son is happy, and I know when my son is bored.  So if I know he needs a bottle, and I am told by someone else he doesn't why do I listen? Why do I take the bottle out of his mouth when he's fighting it, when really I know give him a second and he will down that bottle. I love the, "he will tell me when he is  tired." Yes he may, but there is an actual science and schedule to this. Okay maybe not a science, but I have a schedule that I live by. When I change it even slightly the troll in him comes out!

I can't stand it when I'm trying to put my baby down for a nap, and someone can't stand that he's fussing so they pick him up! Not just pick him up, but "play" with him. When I say play, I actually mean he was being held while "he rode a dog." Don't even ask because I don't even know. Just like Bethenny I was screaming in my head this is insane, but so hesitant to do anything. To me its like your defying my authority. I want to say, "what the hell are you thinking?"

I think in the end I've learned I need to just speak up in these sort of situations, and not worry about being polite. At the end of the day Mom does know best!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

You're Never Too Old For Your Mommy!

This past week I was terribly sick with the stomach flu. It was actually beyond terrible. It was that nonstop need to throw up, aches like you have poison in your legs, and chills that make you shiver.

So I left work early, I actually barely made 2 hours, and I basically just tried to get myself to my mom's house as fast as I could. She watches my son while I work, and her house is 15 minutes closer than my house so of course that was a good stopping point!

As soon as I got there I just ran in, threw up some more lol....ya it was that bad, changed into my moms pjs, and jumped into bed. Ironically I was in my old room and being taken care of by my mother  like I was a child again. I felt so awful I couldn't even move let alone take care of my son's needs. So my poor mother actually had two to take care of. Maybe 3? You know husbands are helpless.

I am so grateful that my mom was there to help me when I really needed her. When I actually started feeling better the next day I lay in my old room thinking even at 28 I seriously need my mom. Then I started thinking how strange it was sleeping in my old room! Yes I stayed there! If I went home my husband would help, but I would still have to worry some what about the dogs or baby. I am sure you know what I mean. Grandmas are so helpful, and I actually think they enjoy it!

So in full circle I started thinking about my own son. Right now he is only 5 1/2 months, but even now when he isn't feeling well all he wants is me. It's so strange and wonderful to think when he is feeling  icky I will be his comfort that can help make things better. No matter how old he is I will always be his mother, and he will always need me. The same goes for my thoughts with him. He will always be my baby. I will always be there for him, and give him all the love and comfort that I can. That is a beautiful thing. What is even more beautiful is my mom has taught me this love that I can now share with my own.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

The light at the end of the tunnel

Why am I doing a blog? I don't know lol! Seriously I do have reasons. My immediate group of girlfriends have decided to take an eternity to have children! Umm ladies I'm still waiting! Luckily numbers are increasing, but I feel like I only have one friend that will be real with me about the whole baby thing! She has been sooo helpful and answers all my questions, but I need more! I am envious of these girlfriends that all have babies around the same age! Hmmm maybe my girlfriends will accidentally get knocked up? I can only hope.

So the point is I have a whole new group of mommy friends on facebook that are now there for me, but I need more people to be real with in another setting. This whole mom thing is hard, and I'm just trying to learn as I go. I want to say the crazy things I think without judgment. Don't take everything I say literal NANA. Its sort of tongue and cheek. Maybe some of my mom confessions would horrify Nana lol. Anyway I just want a mommy group that isn't going through feeds on facebook for people that don't have kids to get annoyed over. Some of my mommy friends are full of knowledge that I soak up like a sponge. Who knew I'd care so much when other moms started rice cereal?

Anways I am consumed with the mommy world, and I am sure only moms really get where I am coming from. Who knew this would happen? So this is my experimental blog. I am still trying to figure this all out. I'd really like for other moms to also be able to vent, and not just me. Any suggestions? Who knew there is a whole blog world of really funny moms?! I love it! Wow Parenting Magazine what have you done to me?

Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better

Why can't woman rally with each other? Why does it always have to be competition and little digs at each other? I think we should support one another and make each other feel better about ourselves not worse.

It truly is a miracle having a baby grow inside of you. Its beautiful yes, but lets be honest its also horrifying. When your ankles swell the size of your head and your stomach looks like a road map, umm yeah not so beautiful. There's much much scarier things that happen, but I am not getting into that.

As I went through my own pregnancy I got the, "are you having twins?" Umm no sweetheart I am not having twins, and yes this is my first! AHhh gasp, "you're so big!" Ahh actually no I'm not, there is a human in me and I am only 5'-3".  There isnt a lot of room. Why the need to say these things to me? Who knows, they're crazy bitches. So as I grew into a whale the digs didn't help. Don't get me wrong, I had plenty of people that told me I was beautiful too. Thank you family and friends. : ) The digs though stayed with me and made me fell HORRIBLE!

My favorite is talking to other moms and comparing the weight gain! There are the moms you can talk to that just laugh with you about the weight gain, but then there are the moms that love to let you know they gained 10lbs. I am exagerating but you know what I mean. I DO have friends that are tiny naturally so its expected during their pregnancy that they stay tiny. My point is your not better than anyone else because you only gained 10 lbs. It's the end result after the babies that counts right ladies? Am I just trying to make myself feel better because I gained 45lbs lol?!?

To the men in our lives that want the pre-baby bod back. No it will never be like how it was, but yes we will get it back. Stretch marks fade, milk engorged boobs perk back up, and that basketball stretched belly tightens up. Ahh doesn't that sound lovely?

To the girls that laugh about the fact they gained 75lbs I praise you for keeping it real. I think some woman lie about how much they gained too. Why though I have no idea.To the woman that gained "the normal amount" good for you for having such self control! I actually think there is soooo much more to pregnancy than self control. Some things are out of our control. I think every past and present prego knows we are all different. Embrace what God gave you, and definitely embrace you had the ability to even carry another human in you!

To all the pregos and ladies that just had a baby. Remember you had a baby grow in you! You'll get it back with a little help from the gym. To the pregos enjoy it! There are plenty of woman that support you in your lives I'm sure. If  not....please get new friends! Here's to hoping we can stick together!!

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Alone in the Crib

I know this may sound awful, but I have to say it has crossed my mind. My baby is 5 1/2 months old. He can barely sit on his own and isn't crawling yet. So he can't really go anywhere. I have two dogs that before the baby had tons of attention so I try to keep their lives the same. Have you ever tried to walk a stroller and 2 dogs? It is freaking hard! If a another dog approaches us forget it its over. The one time I tried another dog came across our path and it turned into chaos. The other woman was trying to detangle me. So it has crossed my mind when my baby is sleeping to take the dogs for a quick walk. Hes safe in his crib so whats the harm? I'll be gone 15 minutes. Don't worry I wont do it. If there was a fire or any sort of disaster I wouldn't be able to live with myself. So am I awful that this even crosses my mind? The same goes for when I need to run into the bank. Getting the car seat out is so annoying and then getting the stroller out! Come on now? I know someone has left the baby in the car! Pre mommyhood I might be in shock seeing a baby alone in a car, but now I am much more understanding!

The "SCV Mom"

So I am a new mom in the SCV, but trust me I always knew the "SCV Mom." For those of you that don't know what SCV stands for it is Santa Clarita Valley. Yep that is where I live and have been living for the past twenty years. Good old Santa Clarita in lovely Cali.

You have to understand there are all kinds of moms in this town from the older moms with grown kids trying to figure out the next step in their lives, the younger new moms exploring mommyhood like me, and the moms that are right smack in the middle of mommyhood who have almost fully mastered the art of being a mom. 

So anyway I want to talk about a whole other breed of mom that is everywhere you go from the grocery store to the restaurants. The "SCV Mom" tends to aim for perfection. She wants to appear she has it all! When I say it all I mean from the look, to the money, to juggling the kiddos. She doesn't work. Her work is hitting the gym, tanning salon, and nail salon. Her part time job is taking care of the kids. Her hair and make-up are always perfect, and even when dressed casual she looks so darn cute. She has the cutest body that makes you envious. Did she really carry all those children? I had one and I am honestly STRUGGLING to lose the baby fat! Its safe to say she has had some sort of plastic surgery. For sure some botox and a good old boob job! She drives an expensive car and lives in a picture perfect house.

I think that the truth is  she may appear to have it all her credit cards are maxed out, she has self esteem issues, and is begging to break out of mommy world to do her own thing! Will I be the "SCV Mom" one day?